If you see all of these on a single commute, you should yell BINGO and wait to receive your prize:

• The phone-talker. If someone calls you, of course you should answer and continue cycling one-handed on a main road during peak hour. It would be rude to just call back later.
• The sms-writer. Fortunately for my tendencies to worry too much about other people, this one is rarer than the phone-talker. Possibly because how long are you going to survive anyway if you do as the phone-talker, except now you’re writing a text message with one hand and steering your way through traffic with the other.
• The smoker. Usually cigarettes, but I did once see an older gentleman with a pipe, wearing a suit. He sailed past me going down via Nizza. He had quilted pannier bags. Even considering I live in Italy, this was a new pinnacle of me feeling comparatively un-stylish.
• The umbrella-user. It’s raining. You need to get somewhere and the bus isn’t convenient. A rain jacket wouldn’t suit your outfit. So you cycle while carrying an umbrella. Obviously.
• The “make do with this ToBike”-er. ToBike is Torino’s bike sharing scheme. Mostly it’s pretty amazing, but sometimes, thanks to vandals, you arrive at a station and the only bike left is missing a seat. Or pedals. Or both brakes. Or all of the above. If you don’t have time to walk to another station, it’s amazing how well you can ride on a bike with only one pedal.